The battle of the nicodemon !

Urgh. I'm embarrassed and ashamed to say - I was a smoker for nearly 10 years. With the exception of a year when I was pregnant and just after lucy was born, that is nearly 10 years of being addicted to the Nicodemon ! ( Nicotine Demon LOL ! )

Well, enough is enough. Here are the reasons for me quitting

1. I love my family more than anything. I cannot let them see my slowly killing myself. I need to be there to see my daughter grow up.

2. I want to feel better. I'm sick of feeling sick, and knowing that me smoking is the thing thats making me sick.

3. I want to smell nice, and taste nice. Poor shane, having to live with an ashtray

4. I want my skin to glow, and not look grey and pallor.

5. I want to save money. Over the past 10 years, I would have spent around $25000 on cigarettes. That is absurd and criminal.

6. I want to prepare my body to be as healthy as can be for when I fall pregnant again.

7. I don't want to be constantly thinking about where I can smoke, when I can have my next one. I'm sick of them ruling my life.

8. I hate being anti social within my friends - out of about 20 of us, only 3 smoke. Now it's only 2.

9. I want to be proud of myself, for changing my life

10. I want to live a clean life !

I am currently on day 6 of not smoking. The first 3 days I used a patch, which was a little bit of a help, but I think it's the nicotine withdrawal symptoms over the past 2 days which have been the worst.

The main symptom I'm feeling is insomnia. It's so hard to fall asleep, I feel like my mind is racing at a million miles an hour ! Last night was one of the first nights I actually got some sleep, thanks to some Valerian tablets !

I can't say I'm not still thinking about smoking. Hell, I even dreamed I was smoking last night. But when I woke up this morning, and I realised it was just a dream, I was so happy with myself.

I am feeling cleaner, have more energy and my skin is looking better. I've already saved $38.40 in the past 6 days on not smoking !

The big test will be tomorrow. Back to work after 2 week on holidays. But I'm determined to do it !

Could this year BE any worse?

To anyone who actually follows this blog, my apologies for not updating for a while. My reason - partial busyness, partial laziness !

So leading into 2010, with a great NY dress up party, I thought to myself - gee, this is going to be a great year !

My god, how wrong I was. The first couple of months have been so stressing/taxing/downright shit. Here's a list of what has gone wrong the past 3 months

Clothes dryer caught on fire and now doesnt' work

Ducted Air conditioner broke down again, and of course during a heat wave

Had to return to work full time ( sob )

Being utterly broke majority of the year

Shane being in pain due to his tooth for about 6 weeks, and me having to hear all about it

Shane finally getting in to see dentist, and then subsequent operation to remove tooth

over $1000 bills for tooth removal - and that is WITH health insurance

A case of shingles for me

A case of gastro for lucy

and probably the worst thing - my car died. Yes, my poor little corolla has given up the ghost. I don't have the money to get it repaired, so I sold it to the wreckers for $300. I cried that day.

I took my baby home from the hospital in that car.

So, we are now the middle of march, and I'm sure I've done my dash with bad luck. I really hope so !